About Me

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Jersey Shore, United States
In case any of my friends or family members actually read this Blog, please consider all Names, Characters, Places and Incidents to be the product of the author's imagination and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales are entirely COINCIDENTAL...Muaaah!! Now, really, about me: I bring the crazy wherever I go, so I've been told...I make fun of myself more than anyone else ever could. I hate: the awkward silence in elevators, watches with no numbers, picky eaters, Cancer and legalism. I love: coffee, stalking Hugh Jackman, my Spanx, COMMENTS, sarcasm and writing: Middle Grade, NA, YA Paranormal and Urban Fantasy.

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Saturday, June 9, 2012

Not My Kid- (Friday) Saturday.. Fact or Fiction

Sorry I didn't post this Friday Fact or Fiction yesterday, but I've spent the past few days without Internet or phone service. I have to admit, the quiet was a bit refreshing. Verizon telling me to expect a repair man any time from 8 am- 8pm yesterday, not so much!! (I will do another post on that later..)

After a popular post of mine titled "Pepper Spray and Pink Tutus" I decided this week's theme should be  about the crazy stuff my kids MAY or MAY Not have done...Happy Friday Saturday Fact or Fiction Everyone!

#1. In an attempt to get to know them better, The Husband invited our brand new Pastor and his wife, back to Jaybird's Nest for dinner. Jaybird MAY or MAY NOT have been distracted and busy cooking in the kitchen, so she called out for her kids to come and greet their guests. Jaybird's daughters MAY OR MAY NOT have devised their own way to formally introduce themselves...By bare-ass MOONING the Pastor and his wife!!

#2.  Jaybird MAY OR MAY NOT have gotten a call from an extremely angry parent. This mom was losing her shiz and screaming like a lunatic, because Jaybird's 6 year old daughter, MAY OR MAY NOT have jacked up her 12 year old son, on the bus. This parent was so ridiculously pissed (not because her boy got his butt handed to him by a little girl) but because now, she had to drive him to school. Apparently, he was too embarrassed to ride the bus, ever again!

#3. Jaybird, MAY or MAY NOT have been on a field trip to the Camden Adventure Aquarium, when she had to have the entire aquarium shut down, for a code Adam. Her daughter, Frankie, who likes to wander, got lost.  Jaybird MAY or MAY NOT have been frantic, searching every square inch of that place in a total panic. Every parent and security guard was also looking for her, and calling her name. But no one could find her. Frankie, MAY OR MAY NOT  have been lost for over an HOUR!! And then, all of a sudden and out of no where, she appeared. Here was Frankie, all on her own, walking straight towards Jaybird and security!

Frankie, (unlike Jaybird) seemed fine, other than being completely soaked from head to toe. She and her purple backpack were absolutely dripping, soaking, wet! The security guards and Jaybird started questioning her, asking where she had been and how she got all wet, but Frankie MAY or MAY NOT have refused to speak. Not a word. 

As a matter of fact, Frankie said nothing the whole way home. She just sat in the back of the mini-van, listening to Jaybird threaten the life out of her, for pulling such a stunt. Even when Jaybird said the dreaded, "Wait until I tell your father!" she stayed completely silent. When Jaybird pulled into the driveway, Frankie was told to go straight to her room. Which she did. She ran straight to her room,  and slammed the door.

 Jaybird got on the phone with The Husband, to tell him her all about her lovely trip, when she heard a suspicious sound coming from Frankie's bedroom. Jaybird, walked into the room and saw Frankie had placed her soaking wet backpack, right smack in the middle of the bed!  Completely incensed,  Jaybird scolded her again, and demanded she take the wet backpack off her comforter. But Frankie wouldn't move.

Jaybird MAY or MAY NOT have heard that weird noise again. Although this time she realized what she heard, was a muffled sound coming from her kid's backpack. And the backpack was moving! Scared, Jaybird said, "Frankie, what's in your backpack?"  She FINALLY, FINALLY broke her silence, as she slowly started to unzip her backpack..She said three words, "I'm keeping it!"

And out of her backpack, Frankie pulled a real, live, baby EMPEROR PENGUIN!!

There you have it! Please vote which stories you think are Fact, and which you think are Fiction! Thanks again, for your  continued participation. I appreciate all comments and/or any "Not My Kid" stories you'd like to share back with me!!


  1. OMG, as much as I want number 3 to be true because that is hilarious - I'm thinking that might be fictional. But - it's also quite a weird one to make up! :D

  2. Hey Kyra! Yes, #3 is quite the tale. I will be posting the answers to this FOF Monday. Look for the truth there :)

    Thanks for always participating!

  3. Ooh, I'm looking forward to the answers. :) I'm guessing false, true, false. I think a little girl of yours could totally kick some older boys butt. ;)

    1. Hi Rach- Thanks to having a Marine and cop for a dad, yes- my girls are three tough little cookies!

  4. I also say false true false, and for #2, I think the boy totally had it coming to him.

    1. B&B- Just posted my answers, go check it out and decide if you think he had it coming....