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Jersey Shore, United States
In case any of my friends or family members actually read this Blog, please consider all Names, Characters, Places and Incidents to be the product of the author's imagination and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales are entirely COINCIDENTAL...Muaaah!! Now, really, about me: I bring the crazy wherever I go, so I've been told...I make fun of myself more than anyone else ever could. I hate: the awkward silence in elevators, watches with no numbers, picky eaters, Cancer and legalism. I love: coffee, stalking Hugh Jackman, my Spanx, COMMENTS, sarcasm and writing: Middle Grade, NA, YA Paranormal and Urban Fantasy.

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Monday, July 11, 2011

A shared love of Alexander McQueen, and other wonderful things!!

This morning I asked my daughter what she wanted for her 10th b-day. Brief pause, then, "Can we go to the MET and take in the Savage Beauty Exhibit?" Um, can you say, HELL TO THE YEAH!!

OMG I want to see that McQueen exhibit so freaking bad!! And I am over the moon my daughter asked to go see it for her b-day, but, a little warning bell started ringing in my head. I began racking my brain, trying to remember if I ever, mentioned wanting to go, in front of her. I don't think I have... but I wanted to be absolutely certain. I don't want her to want to see the exhibit, just because I want to. (Are you following my cracked logic here?)

As a rule, I keep almost everything I want to do, to myself. (Unless you count when I blog/whine about it, LOL!) The opportunities to pick up and go do whatever I want to do, now that I'm a mom, just don't happen very much anymore. When something I would love to do crosses my path, I usually just sigh and pause for a moment. Then I think to myself, how nice would it be if I could just go into the city and...take in the McQueen exhibit? Or how nice would it be if I could just go out and meet some friends for a drink....but then someone barges into the bathroom and interrupts even the thought of me doing something for myself. (Like using the bathroom!)

Don't get me wrong, I am very, very happy in my role as a momma. There is absolutely nothing in this world I love more than my three little girls. And I certainly don't ever want my children to feel or think for a second I resent giving up doing things, for them. I chose this life. I chose to have THEM. And I would, without hesitation, make the same choice, again and again and again.

But now I'm faced with a little dilemma. (This is a very similar situation to one I was in, not that long ago, with the very same kid in question here. This same kid won the opportunity to go to the Young Author's Conference with her excellent writing skills, and I wigged. Big time. Look back at that blog entry for a little writing sample of hers, and a laugh.) And yet here I am, back in a similar situation, with this same kid, and I'm wigging out, all over again.

Did I mention how much I love her? She and I are very much alike. If she were an adult, she would be, without a doubt, one of my BFF's. Is it wishful thinking, that this child of mine and I, could genuinely share the love of writing, art, fashion, books, and music??? Or, am I just kidding myself and this is the very same delusional thinking a Toddlers & Tiaras mom has, (who I abhor, BTW), while swearing up and down to the camera, trying to convince herself and all of America, her kid just LOVES competing in Beauty Pageants? OMG, my mind is reeling.

I don't ever want to be the type of mom who pressures her kids into loving what I love, just because I do!! I don't ever want them to think I won't be supportive or approve of what makes their little hearts and minds tick. I want my girls to grow up to be individuals, with a very strong sense of self!! All that being said, I have to admit to feeling absolute, pure, unadulterated, JOY when my girl asked to go to an ART EXHIBIT for her b-day!! Did I mention she's only 10? Am I (pushing) leaning my kids towards what I love without meaning to? How do you know? How can you tell if she really, really loves these things too, or she's doing it to make you happy?

Of course, any advice and/or comments, are always greatly appreciated. Especially if you have older children and went through a similar wigging. Maybe, only time will tell where her true interests lie. In the meantime, it is wrong to revel in the glory of taking my first mother/daughter trip to the MET????

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