About Me

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Jersey Shore, United States
In case any of my friends or family members actually read this Blog, please consider all Names, Characters, Places and Incidents to be the product of the author's imagination and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales are entirely COINCIDENTAL...Muaaah!! Now, really, about me: I bring the crazy wherever I go, so I've been told...I make fun of myself more than anyone else ever could. I hate: the awkward silence in elevators, watches with no numbers, picky eaters, Cancer and legalism. I love: coffee, stalking Hugh Jackman, my Spanx, COMMENTS, sarcasm and writing: Middle Grade, NA, YA Paranormal and Urban Fantasy.

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Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Too Much Information!!

Ok- I have so much to blog I am going to have to break it up or this will be even more confusing than my usual ramblings. First and foremost: While away in Hawaii, my house got struck by lightening. Seriously. I have lost my computer totally. ( I am using my parents right now) All of the information, including but not limited to my 375 page book, have been lost. Everyone's favorite question is, didn't you have a surge protector? Duh. Of course I had a surge protector, FYI, they aren't worth shit if your house is actually struck by lightening!! They only help if there is a SURGE in the power, hence the whole surge protector name thing. The next question is, didn't you back it up? Yes. Yes I did back it up. Unfortunately, the flash drive I used, isn't working! It keeps coming up BLANK.... So needless to say, I'm pretty upset. I can't really write too much more on that without my head exploding so I am gonna be done now.

Second: In addition to losing my computer, I have no power in many random areas of my house. The hot water heater blew up, so did the tv, phones and any and all other various household appliances you would want to use upon returning home after a long trip, like Hawaii.

Third: Hawaii. My favorite of all. Thank God we did not know of all the craziness until we got back, which meant, while on vacation, everything was wonderful. Hawaii is awesome. I will break that down into many mini-blogs for sure, but overall AWESOME is the best word to describe it.

I, keeping true to form, took the worst pictures of all time and will not be posting most of them. The worst (immediately upon seeing it, it was burned and all copies similarly disposed of) was the picture of me the husband took, from behind, right up in my business. The poor person who developed that film either had the laugh of his life, or the immediate pleasure of his lunch returning through his stomach and out his mouth. Then, of course, there are my regulars, one eye open and the other shut, my mouth full and talking etc. etc. None of which will be appearing on this blog any time soon. The children, of course, look fantastic and I ruin all of the family shots with my hideous picture taking curse.

Looking forward to elaborating on all of the above in the near future, hopefully on my own computer from the comforts of my own home. (Which, hopefully, will also be returned to normal)

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

So pissed. Really truly mad. And it takes A LOT to make me mad.

OK. I am so pissed off it's not funny. Can't remember the last time I was this mad at something other than "The Husband". You are all well aware of my eating next to nothing and kickboxing schedule that has increased substantially since my fat white rear end is due to land on the unsuspecting beaches of Kona in the very near future, right?

Do you recall when I recently blogged about the kids being sick and me being stuck in the snow storm with them? Isn't it just my freaking luck to actually manage to lose weight, while being trapped in the house during the past three snow storms, with my family eating like crazy all around me? Yet, I really did do it! I was so very proud of myself. Until, four days ago, I weighed myself and my weight had gone up. Way up. Like almost five pounds up. How can that be since I was right on track for a change, working out like a fiend and eating jack shit to sustain a fatty like me? Turns out the kids had Fifth's Disease. And now I do too. (Should have known something was very amiss when my oldest daughter starting screaming, mom, come quick, I look like HellBoy!!) Only instead of being covered in a raging red rash, when it comes to this adult female, it manifested itself a little differently than with the kids. I can't walk! My knees, hands, elbows and feet are so swollen I look like the Stay Puff Marshmallow Girl!! And I'm PISSED! All of that hard work, right down the drain.

But wait, there's more.. To make me even more furious, I have to go on steroids. Steroids, of course, have the awesome side effect of making you bloat and GAIN WEIGHT. Man, I am so discouraged. I know this is so unlike me, to be angry, pessimistic, overall pouty and whining like a little girl, but I am really, truly angry. And you wouldn't like me when I'm angry.... LOL. Maybe I will turn into a giant Hulk like creature, now that I am on the juice. I'm definitely mad enough to! It just doesn't seem fair. I've tried so hard. I've put in so much effort and now I'm going to be sitting on the beach in Hawaii, dodging the harpoons. Damn.

Yes, I know I am being melodramatic. The husband offered no sympathy to my plight and tears of frustration, but what did I expect from the very same man whose favorite form of entertainment is to eat meatball subs and watch me, from the couch, while I work out? Ugh. He just says "no matter what, you always look hot." No offense to the husband and I do appreciate the compliment, but I'm not on a diet or doing any of this for him, I'm doing it for ME.

So here I am, depressed and angry, ten pounds up, when I had been only ten pounds away from my goal weight! And there is not a freagging thing I can do about it. Doesn't that justify, just a little bit of my anger? I'm sure anyone who has ever had to battle losing weight would agree with me. Hopefully, I will be able to overcome this and be back to my usual, optimistic self soon :(