Have you ever been the first one on a scene, or in a true emergency? How do you react? I am SO ashamed to admit- I'm absolutely useless in an emergency. I sweat. I cry. I panic and hyper-ventilate. And for days afterwards, I will suffer from lovely stomach ailments like massive cramps, vomiting and diarrhea. No joke. I completely fall apart. I am NOT the person you want to be with if there's an accident. God help me, I don't know why I react this way; it's like the brain inside my head suddenly shrivels up to the size of a pea and my stomach turns to absolute mush. Why? Why am I so useless? My whole family (other than me) comes from a medical background. They talk casually over dinner about stuff that makes me gag and start to shake and sweat. Why was I born without the gene or ability to stay calm, cool and collected in an emergency?
When my daughter Farrah was born, she had a respiratory problem where she would all of a sudden turn blue and stop breathing. I was not permitted to take her home from the hospital until I was trained in infant CPR. The Husband and I had to take special training classes just to learn how to use her emergency breathing monitor. Right in the middle of the class, at just the thought of me having to perform CPR on my infant, I had to jump up and run to the bathroom to go vomit. Thank the Lord (for my kids and myself) I chose a husband wisely. That man has had years of training and experience in CPR and emergency response. The Husband can pretty much respond to any type of disaster, natural or otherwise and remain completely, unfailingly, calm. Unlike me. It's seriously humbling to know, that if something really bad goes down, your kids are better equipped to handle things than you are. But how does one go about changing years of inability?
On Easter last year, (at my house) my beloved twelve year old niece suffered a grand mal seizure. It came out of no where and it came as a HUGE shock, to me. Thank God, my family was all there and were able to respond quickly and efficiently. They knew immediately what was happening to her and what to do to keep her safe. But, as usual, I crumbled. Right to pieces. I had NO idea what you're supposed to do and I highly doubt even if I did, I would have been able to execute what needed to be done properly. I still have nightmares about seeing her unresponsive like that, for so long. I can't seem to burn that horrible image from my mind. Maybe it was the shock or maybe it's because I watched her mother, (my sister) suffer so tremendously before she died, I just flat out lost it. Even though my niece has since been diagnosed with epilepsy, and has been placed on medication and is perfectly fine now, that scene still haunts me. And it most likely, always will.
Believe it or not, I've taken lots of classes and I possess a tremendous amount of medical knowledge. I am a very compassionate person and have taken care of plenty of people who are sick and/or dying. It's not like I lack empathy- quite the opposite. It's the putting all of that knowledge into practice and not panicking during an emergency, that I lack. Does anyone else find themselves (to their shame and horror) reacting like me? Have any of you been able to overcome your trepidation and turn yourself into an EMT? I'd love to hear from you. Have you, could you or do you see yourself ever working in an ER? If you are in the field, let me just take a moment here to say, great big fat THANK YOU for doing what you do!
* I find it ironic that my mom, aunts, brother, father, husband, uncles, cousins, mother in law, practically everyone in my life, (other than me) has worked as nurses, techs, doctors, corpsmen, in labs and in hospital ERs and yet, I'm so freaking useless, I can't even watch the damn TV show without breaking into a sweat! Ugh.
- Jersey Shore, United States
- In case any of my friends or family members actually read this Blog, please consider all Names, Characters, Places and Incidents to be the product of the author's imagination and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales are entirely COINCIDENTAL...Muaaah!! Now, really, about me: I bring the crazy wherever I go, so I've been told...I make fun of myself more than anyone else ever could. I hate: the awkward silence in elevators, watches with no numbers, picky eaters, Cancer and legalism. I love: coffee, stalking Hugh Jackman, my Spanx, COMMENTS, sarcasm and writing: Middle Grade, NA, YA Paranormal and Urban Fantasy.