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Jersey Shore, United States
In case any of my friends or family members actually read this Blog, please consider all Names, Characters, Places and Incidents to be the product of the author's imagination and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales are entirely COINCIDENTAL...Muaaah!! Now, really, about me: I bring the crazy wherever I go, so I've been told...I make fun of myself more than anyone else ever could. I hate: the awkward silence in elevators, watches with no numbers, picky eaters, Cancer and legalism. I love: coffee, stalking Hugh Jackman, my Spanx, COMMENTS, sarcasm and writing: Middle Grade, NA, YA Paranormal and Urban Fantasy.

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Friday, February 15, 2013

Romance Week: Episode Four Bad Romance

Now that Valentine's Day is over  I thought I'd pick Bad Romance for today's topic. We all know how awesome love is when things go right. But when it goes bad, OY. Look out!
Sometimes, Cupid can be a douche.
If you ask me, it's starts early. Right from the first meeting. Everyone has a choice. A choice to be honest about their feelings, who they really are and what they want from the relationship. If more people started things off honestly wouldn't it save so much heart ache?

Recently I had the opportunity to hang out, observe and chaperon my daughter's class (a bunch of 11 year old  tweenage boys and girls). What a trip they are to watch! Some girls have already discovered the act of flirting while others (like my daughter) have no interest or clue. Some of the boys are already working on their  "game" and others, Lord have mercy! One boy in particular just cracked me up.

He arrived to school, in a suit,  with a ginormous cup of coffee and a donut in one hand, and his I-phone in the other.  As soon as he got there he made the rounds. He threw out a lot of hooks but it was painfully obvious none of the girls were interested in taking the bait. After he struck out royally he proceeded to come over and sit down next to me.  I had to be all chaperoney Jaybird so I  said,

"Dude, you know you are not allowed to have that phone in here. And what's with the 50 ounce cup of coffee?"

This little boy,  bless his heart, looked around to see who all was listening. Then in  all seriousness and in a very loud voice so everyone could hear him, he said, "Sorry Miss Jen, but I need the caffeine. I was up all night on the phone with my girlfriend in Canada."

Bahahaha! Oh my gosh it took everything in me not to loose it. I had no idea the whole  "girlfriend in Canada" lie was still in circulation. It's like the twenty-something equivalent of  "This is only temporary, because he's going to leave his wife for me" lie. Why oh why can't people just be honest?

So, the day after Valentine's Day I have to ask- What's your  Bad Romance story? Any other widely circulated cliche "bad romance" lies come to mind?  What do you think is the main cause of  bad romances?

*I think I've been pretty forth-coming when it comes to sharing a bit about some of my bad romances. (See my "First Loves" or my "If I Let You Go" Blog Hop entries below if your interested in reading a little more on that) Bottom line, if either of those guys would have been honest, right up front, it would have saved me a whole lot heart ache. ~Jaybird

If I Let You Go
 
There really is no one like you. Your long golden hair all wind-blown from your sail. And your eyes, those crystal clear blue eyes. I could get as lost in their depths, as you could in the deep blue sea surrounding us. Despite all of the guys standing on the dock waiting for you, you reached out and pulled me close. Naturally, we started to dance. As you twirled me around, I thought, my God, you were my sun! But I, I was just one of the many planets that revolved around you.
  
Oh, how desperate I was to loose myself in this moment. I wanted to close my eyes and breathe you in and not care. I wanted to kiss those salty, beautiful lips and pretend they didn't spew forth falsehoods. I wanted to keep our bodies pressed together and go on dancing with you forever. I never, ever, wanted to let you go. It's killing me knowing what I must do. It will sting when I walk away and for that, I am truly sorry. But unlike me, you'll recover. Another planet quickly moving in, filling up my empty space.
 
Your eyes twinkle with mischief as you twirl me again and suddenly, I'm knocked off my feet. We fall in a tangled heap of limbs and laughter onto the sand. As I catch my breath, you smile and stare into my eyes. Slowly, gently, you brush the hair away from my face. You tighten your grip around me and press your body even closer to mine. When you look at me like that, everything else around us just falls away. For a moment there is only us in the entire universe. Your deep voice is so fierce it comes out sounding more like a growl, when you say, "I love you". And in that moment, I almost believe you. Then I can't help myself from tasting those lips, one last time. Unable to resist the siren sounds of your friends and the sea calling any longer, you jump up and take off down the beach.
 
As I watch you go, I grab a fist full of sand and try to hold on. But it slips through my fingers, like time.

My First Love
 
The relentless August sun was burning the top of my dark head. I was trying not to panic, but I was lost, late and completely drenched with sweat on the first day of classes. I've always been a bit of a spaz, and I distinctly remember thinking, "Way to go Jen, great way to kick start your college career!" A light breeze picked up and carried tiny droplets of water from a nearby sprinkler.

I closed my eyes and turned my face into that wind, truly delighted by it's unexpected coolness. When I opened my eyes, he was there. He stood stock still and perfect before me, like some sort of ridiculous bronze sculpture. Why would this perfect man, be staring at me? I had to be sure. I turned around and looked over my shoulder, just to see if there was some hot blond coming up behind me. I could tell he was slightly amused by this. In two giant strides, he closed the distance between us. Then he smiled at me. I had thought the sun was brilliant today, but it was nothing compared to that smile.

"You're a Freshman, right?"
"Um yes." Was my patheticness that apparent?
"You have that lost look." Guess so!
"I, um, uh, need to find a building. I mean A-building, not "a building". I need to get to Western Civ." Duh! I answered him with all the eloquence of Mr. Bean. I couldn't believe how bad I was blowing this.
"My next class is in A-building. I'd be happy to walk you there."

The way he was looking at me, man, no one had ever looked at me like that before! I knew I should walk away. I screamed at myself, look away, look down, look anywhere but up into those amazing green eyes. But for the life of me, I could not. Something in his eyes, held the power to leech my will and hold me back. It wasn't until he reached out his hand, and I accepted it, my body could move again. I should have instinctively known, right then and there, his influence on me was not natural. I suspect deep down inside I did, but I just didn't care.

My first love was as hot and relentless as that August sun. It completely consumed me. When it was over, I was left with the realization that I would never love anyone with that much reckless abandon, ever again. He stole a little piece of my soul, the very first time I looked into those eyes. And I have never gotten it back.


25 comments:

  1. You need to find out how that's kid's father dresses - maybe he was imitating him.

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    1. Sadly, there is no father in the picture. He is being raised (mostly) by his grandparents. My heart bleeds for this kid because he is just so terribly desperate for any attention he'll do whatever he can, good or bad, to get it.

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  2. Oh that poor little boy. I think the most important thing is to listen to intuition. I ended up in very bad relationships because I thought my love could change someone else. Magical thinking at its worst. If something doesn't feel right, don't try to make it something it isn't.
    Karen

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    1. I agree! If only we could figure that out in our tweenage years, man would life be so much less complicated-

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  3. I had the same thought as Alex! My daughter is 11 and zero interest in boys.

    As for bad romance, there are so many to choose from, but one that stands out is the boyfriend who came to visit my parents when I wasn't home and spent an entire afternoon sobbing with my mother about the demise of our relationship. I probably don't need to say it, but she's a VERY patient woman.

    P.S. Now that you know about my crush I can add that Monica Lewinksy used to babysit for the previous owners of our house and that fact always makes me feel a little connected to the man of my dreams! ;)

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    1. Unfortunately, there is no father in the picture for that poor boy. I'm really glad your daughter and mine can't be bothered with the boys yet. It will come soon enough!

      And- God bless your mom, she had patience indeed. My momma thinks she's an Italian Yenta and was always trying to fix me up with somebody! Can't tell you how many times I came home only to find some strange boy she was stuffing full of food in my kitchen, while they waited for me. Gah!

      *You crack me up! Even your house has history and a connection- with Monica Lewinsky babysitting there and all. Too funny.

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  4. I've had a lot of romances, but luckily none were really bad.

    Today my daughter (13) went on a field-trip with her class. They traveled to the State Capitol in cars driven by parents (it's a very small private school) and her teacher made sure each car had just girls or just boys. The girls cheered, the boys complained. Haha...there are a lot of players in her grade. What's up with that? :)

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    1. I'm so happy you were spared from having any bad romances!

      And, man, it that age weird. Some of kids are ready and some just aren't. My philosophy, no need to push, they will all catch up eventually. I like the idea of boys in one car, girls in the other, saves a lot of drama!

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  5. My first love consumed me too, and burned me, but I guess that's what you can expect from fire dragons. Not easy lovers at all. Honesty right up front? Hmmm, yeah that could have changed things a bit.

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    1. Ouch. Sorry to hear you got burned. But I bet you were a tough enough dragon to shrug it off and move on. To me, honesty, is the difference between making someone look like a joke and having a real relationship.

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  6. That was a crack up :)

    I was also clueless to the 'Canadian girlfriend' story still being in circulation....very cute, though.

    Have a great weekend!

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    1. Thanks, Mark. Glad you liked it. Yeah, I was shocked the Canadian girlfriend was still going strong. And if it were any other kid, I might have had to actually believe him!!

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    1. Little kids and their imaginary girlfriends

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    2. Hey Adam! I know, right? Poor kid. I felt really bad for him; it was pretty sad.

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  8. Oh, man... there is such discrepancy between boys and girls in the tween years! I have one of each. My daughter was miraculously much smarter in the boy domain than the impulsive thing she is everywhere else, but my son... Oh MAN... TALL, Blond, blue eyes, dimple... he had seven or more girlfriends in sixth grade (that I heard about) and today I am convinced at least half were accidental... He had a TARGET on his head... he's nice! And CUTE! Go after HIM!

    But in defense of the girlfriend in Canada... as a tween and teen, I was the world's best pen pal for MANY people, at least half of whom were boys, some portion of whom were probably seen as geeky by their peers. I liked the attention and couldn't manage it at home, so I collected these boys in other places... I'm dead serious. The ones I saw periodically I had to clarify relationships on (the boy where we skied who pretty much wanted to marry me), but most of them, I could just be fabulous, and if they called me their girlfriend to sound cool to their friends... well I'd back em up if the friend wrote... (I was always tall, so until I was old enough for college boys, I didn't get many local dates)

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    1. Hart- ha! You crack me up. Good luck with that handsome son of yours! Tweenage girls can get quite pushy when they like someone.

      I had many boy "friends" I helped out too. A couple were in the closet and just tired of getting beat up so I promised to play along and be their girlfriend. Also, I had a French pen pal named Arnold- he actually asked me first if he could show my picture around and tell everyone I was his American girlfriend. Even though I never met him in person, of course I said, OUI! I was flattered.

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  9. Replies
    1. I hate having to be all chaperoney! I just wanted to hug the poor kid and tell him everything was going to be alright and if he stopped trying so hard, one day, he'd snag himself a real girlfriend. :)

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  10. If my kids tried to go to school in a suit, I think I'd have to wrestle them at the front door and force them into jeans!!

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    1. He is so pathetic Annalisa-honestly I really feel bad for this kid! He tries so hard and will do anything for attention; but the girls just scatter when he shows up. My husband said to me, "When I watch that kid it breaks my heart so much I just want to snatch him up and adopt him!" lol

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  11. That is hilarious about the tweens. Funny that I was my husband's girlfriend in Canada! *LOL*

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    1. Ba ha ha ha! Oh my gosh Christine, you are the first "real" girlfriend in Canada I've ever heard of. I could only imagine your hubs trying to tell people, "No, really, she's a real girl!"

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  12. Oh, that little boy! What a pumpkin! Why do they never realize that no one believes the girlfriend story??

    My bad relationships (fortunately few) have been because I was more in love than the guy was. The last time was devastating. That doesn't feel good :( But I havent given up hope that there will still come a man who will be crazy about me!

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    1. Oh my gosh Kianwi- I hear you. I am praying that you will meet someone just over the top, head over heels, crazy for you!!

      After I got burned a few times I decided from then on I would always pick someone who was (1) much fatter than me (2) more interested in me then I was in him! LOL :)

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