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Jersey Shore, United States
In case any of my friends or family members actually read this Blog, please consider all Names, Characters, Places and Incidents to be the product of the author's imagination and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales are entirely COINCIDENTAL...Muaaah!! Now, really, about me: I bring the crazy wherever I go, so I've been told...I make fun of myself more than anyone else ever could. I hate: the awkward silence in elevators, watches with no numbers, picky eaters, Cancer and legalism. I love: coffee, stalking Hugh Jackman, my Spanx, COMMENTS, sarcasm and writing: Middle Grade, NA, YA Paranormal and Urban Fantasy.

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Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Un- Balanced

I wear so many hats but just can't seem to get them all to fit on my head, at once! How do you place your time and energy into one thing and not forsake all the others?  I guess I'm an epic failure at multi-tasking. Oh, I can do it, like any woman can, but that doesn't mean something or someone doesn't suffer for it. And I don't wind up feeling, so completely GUILTY.

How can I move from being Unbalanced-to-Balanced? A lot of women I know, feel the same way I do, but refuse to acknowledge it. They don't want to admit (to themselves, or anyone else) they can't do it all! There is this stigma attached to admitting our shortcomings. But why? Why are women in particular, so hard on themselves? Why do women judge others for their lack of balance, meanwhile, their constantly fighting to maintain it themselves? I'm  not sure.  I'm the wrong person to ask because my philosophy, has always been the opposite.

I vocalize all of my faults, shouting them from the roof tops, to whomever will listen, in the hopes  of finding a solution. Knowing, full well, people are going to criticize me. I have had plenty of people openly judge me for being so forthcoming. Once, after I admitted to having trouble keeping my house picked up, I had a friend say to me, "I just don't understand how your house can get so messy?!?" 

Yep, she who made this hurtful comment, has also dropped other such brilliant statements on me, such as: How could I be a stay-at-home mom since they don't do anything all day and I must be SO bored? Really? OK, after making the same gesture to the phone as Spike here, I had to mull over her asshole comments and gain a better perspective. In this "friend's" home, there is only one off-spring and a husband who loves to cook, clean and do laundry. It was really unfathomable to her, that my house (or anyone else's) could ever become unkempt, so quickly.

I find it funny, that although I'm the one who openly admits to being a fast disaster and constantly puts myself out there, also happens to be the first person my friends and family members call for help, when they have a problem?!!

Is there some kind of correlation here? Compare yourself to the worst, and it will make you feel better about yourself? Kinda like when I watch my 600 lb life or an episode of Hoarders...I will never allow myself to get that fat, or let my house go until I no longer see floor. IDK.  Opening yourself up to such brutal honestly and judgement hurts. But I'd rather be hurt and grow from it, than pretend like there's nothing wrong. Because  I'm totally convinced that:

     All the women who go around deny, deny, denying they have problems, acting like they have it together all the time, and aren't "F"ed up, are the  most "F" ed of  us all!

I'm very curious what you think. Any one else out there like me, who will openly admit to and own up to feeling UNBALANCED?   Or, am I the one who's wrong to air all of my faults, not even trying to pretend to have it all together?

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