About Me

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Jersey Shore, United States
In case any of my friends or family members actually read this Blog, please consider all Names, Characters, Places and Incidents to be the product of the author's imagination and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales are entirely COINCIDENTAL...Muaaah!! Now, really, about me: I bring the crazy wherever I go, so I've been told...I make fun of myself more than anyone else ever could. I hate: the awkward silence in elevators, watches with no numbers, picky eaters, Cancer and legalism. I love: coffee, stalking Hugh Jackman, my Spanx, COMMENTS, sarcasm and writing: Middle Grade, NA, YA Paranormal and Urban Fantasy.

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Friday, March 23, 2012

How to Unhealthy Turkey Burgers, The Husband's Way

I have many posts dedicated to The Husband. If I were a comedian, The Husband would provide me with enough material to fuel my entire career, even if I were Betty White. I happen to think the same is true of this blog.

It still shocks the people we meet that we are indeed, a couple. And not just because he shows up nice places wearing sweats with holes, and I show up, over-dressed with giant hair and enough make-up to rival a drag queen. (I am a Jersey Girl, after all)  But especially when he opens his mouth, and I am forced to give them, "The Disclaimer".

For those of you unfamiliar with "The Disclaimer" I'll enlighten you. I make it a priority to inform new friends we meet, "The views and opinions expressed by the individual (insert Husband's name here)are solely those of the individual and do not in any way, reflect those of the Network (otherwise known as me)"  It saves the trouble of having to apologize/explain later, if they didn't already notice from our appearances, we are complete opposites. In everything we say and do.

That being said, why was I  still shocked, last night, when I asked My Partner in Crime to finish making dinner for me, and  I wound up with what I did, for dinner???

I had to run out unexpectedly, but  had already started grilling Jenny-O Turkey Burgers, with whole wheat buns. (Thank you Biggest Loser for your shameless promotion of these burgers, because I've grown quite fond of them!) So I asked The Husband if he would jump in and finish making dinner. So,  he "helped". And this is what I came home to:

Only he could "Unhealthy" a healthy dinner. He added bacon, mushrooms, onions, and wait for it:  Yep, that's a hunk of  FRIED MACARONI AND CHEESE !!! He added Fried Freagging Macaroni and Cheese, to my healthy burger. He's impossible. And I hate, hate, hate to admit it, but they were disgustingly good. Bastard! The kids thought they'd died and gone to heaven.
He even took pictures, because he thinks it's hilarious, to screw with my "evil" agenda to make him eat healthy!!Ugh.
Needless to say,  I won't be asking him to "help" with making dinner again, any time soon. Which may or may not have been part of his plan, all along.   :)


  1. I wasn't hungry until I read this.
    The Husband is a visionary.

    1. Hey Ash- A visionary, oh my, will The Husband be pleased with that! Even I had to give him props, b/c those burgers tasted so dang goood. :)

  2. Hi there! I popped over from Katie Mills's Bloffee.

    I approve of your husband trying to make the turkey burgers taste good by adding cheese, onions, and bacon. I'm not sure anything can make a turkey burger worth eating, but those things might help.

    Fried macaroni and cheese, however? Ugh. Is that the newest "thing?" Because I went to a book launch on Sunday that had a catering staff (yeah, fancy), and the caterers kept trying to give me fried macaroni and cheese. I'd never heard of it before -- and now twice in one week!

  3. Hi Diane- So nice to meet you. I'm so happy you popped in. Welcome, Welcome, Welcome to the Bird's Nest!

    Wow, sounds like you were at a fabulous book launch, hope you enjoyed it.

    As far as the fried mac and cheese, I'm not sure I would have liked it as a stand alone. But even I had to admit to The Husband,(eventually..LOL) those turkey burgers never tasted so good!! When you first took a bite, it had the cheesiest, creamiest flavor, then you were hit with the crispy crunch of the breadcrumbs and bacon. It was an amazing combo. Just killed me to tell him the truth, b/c I'm trying so hard not to eat/serve such fattening crap to the family. I believe one of those burgers alone, has more Weight Watchers points than you are allowed in a year!! LOL

    Please pop back over and visit again, real soon. ~ Jaybird

  4. Too funny! They do have a habit of adding in those extras, don't they? At least it was edible!! :)

    1. Hey Jemi! Thanks so much for stopping over. I really, really, wish I didn't find those burgers to be so edible. I will continue to blame it on The Husband though, because that's much easier than admitting how easy it is to corrupt my healthy eating habits. (LOL)

      Come back and visit again soon!

  5. You are HILARIOUS! I literally laughed out loud at your post. (You watch the Biggest Loser, too? I'm addicted to that show.)
    Wandered over from Creepy Query Girl's Bloffee and love your sense of humour. Consider me a happy new follower!

    1. Ms Cathy-Thank you so much for your kind comments. You just made my day. Sometimes my humour goes over like a fart in church, so I'm always happy when someone appreciates it! Anyway, welcome, to the Bird's Nest. I'm so happy to have you as a new follower.

      Please, fly back over and visit the nest again soon. Who knows what The Husband will do next? ~Jaybird

    2. PS: Cathy, if you are interested, further thoughts on how I feel about watching "Biggest Loser" are available here, take a peak into my archives and click on my blog post titled "Biggest Loser"...then let me know what you think!!